Every Thing Has It's Day
by Reader-Writer-Animator
Summary: Cliffjumper was having a completely normal day until a furry organic showed up under his tires. In the course of the day, Ratchet was pushed out of his own medibay, Fowler was bowled over by a mutt and said mutt was given an admittedly stupid name. Yup. Completely normal.


**Sorry to those who viewed this earlier. Some kind of error occured and it posted something weird... But that's fixed now, so enjoy.**

* * *

I was cruisin' along, out on patrol. And as usual, Arcee and I were chatting over the radio. Half because I can't stop talking, half because she is forced to listen, and half because I'm awesome. (I know, I know, that makes three halves and that's impossible.)

"So, Breakdown says, if you don't decode the transmission, it's going to be hammer time. So I asked if it was 'cause he was too dumb to do it himself. Logical question, right?"

She responded with a snort. "From the Cliffjumper angle, maybe."

"Anyway, he gave me a big whop with the hammer. It hurt pretty bad. So I started decoding. And it said that the Autobots were going to lead an attack on Kaon in two solar cycles. I couldn't exactly give away the suspense away, could I?"

"Of course not."

"So, when Breakdown asked what it was, guess what I said."

Arcee groaned. " Not another one of your guess-me's."

"Yup, it is!" If I were in robot mode, I would have grinned.

"At least give me a hint, will you?"

"Fine." I took a moment to think about what I should say."Um...It has something to do with Unicron and Megatron."

"They both end with the same two letters?"

"Nope."

"Unicron...defeated Megatron?"

"Nope again."

"Unicron ate Megatron?"

"Aw, come on, that was just random."

"You ask stupid questions, you get stupid answers."

"Fine, I'll tell. Megatron smells like Unicron's armpit."

"What?" I could hear her laughing her spark out. "Are you crazy? Oh, wait, I already know the answer to that one."

"And then Prowl came in, held by a bunch of Vehicons, and I swear, for the first time in my entire life, I saw him laughing." She chuckled.

Right at that moment, I felt some thing organic. And hairy. And that something went _squish_ under my tires. Arcee must've realized that I'd gone silent, since she said, "Cliff? What happened?"

"I'm not sure." I admitted. I swiveled my rear view to make sure no one was around on this dusty trail, then transformed. Where my front tires had been, there was a tiny, limp organic creature. Oops... I picked it up care fully.

"Um, Arcee, could you lend me a servo?"

"What happened? 'Cons?" she asked, already on full alert.

"No. It's, uh, a thing. An organic thing. I think it might have gone underneath my tires."

Arcee sighed. "_Please_ don't tell me it's a human."

"No!" I said, annoyed. "It's a thing, not a human. Definitely not a human. If it was, it would have been tall enough for me to see it when it was on the road."

I could almost hear her rolling her optics. "Whatever. Bridge it back to base, and if Ratchet can fix it, he will. And if it _is_ a human, then Primus help you with Agent Fowler."

"But it's not-" I started ,then realized that she'd already cut the connection. I stared at the thing in my servos. It was furry, with floppy ears almost too big for it's head. It also had a long tail. And it was tiny enough to be microscopic. Now that I think about it, it was kind of cute...

"Cliffjumper, requesting a groundbridge." I said in a sing song voice. "And Ratchet, do you think you could fix up an organic thing?"

"What? If it's a human, I'm not even trying." I was about to throw my servos up in exasperation, when I realized the Thing would fall down if I did. "Why in the pits of Kaon does everybody think it's a human? It's a, um, a thing!"

"Fine, fine. Opening up a groundbridge."

The portal came into existence before me. I'd always liked the lights a groundbridge would throw up. Green, blue and purple.

I strode more or less purposefully into the groundbridge and quickly emerged on the other side. Ratchet was waiting, tapping his pede impatiently.

"Here you go, Docbot!" I said, handing the Thing over to him. "Don't call me that!" he threw over his shoulder,as he stormed towards the medbay. I followed him... until he shut the door in my face.

Suddenly, the computer beeped to signal a transmission. "Arcee, requesting groundbridge."

"Docbot, should I get that?" I shouted, hoping it would get through the door. A muffled _Don't call me that! _came through and "Yes, you might as well."

I powered up the groundbridge and out came Arcee. Just then, Bumblebee poked his head out from the hallway and chirped a greeting. "Hey, Bumblebee." I said cheerfully. He came out.

"So, hows your 'thing' going?" asked Arcee casually. **What thing?** asked Bumblebee, confused.

"Well, since Cliffjumper here is the smartest Cybertronian in the universe, he ran over an organic thing-" Bee's optics widened in horror "- and now Ratchet is trying to repair it." **Cliffjumper, you could have killed it! **I looked down, struck by a wave of guilt. "I know, I know."

At that very moment, Ratchet burst out of the medibay and into the room. "It'll live." he announced grimly. "But I had to replace some of it's internal organs with metal parts. It is sleeping right now."

"So it's a techno – organic now?" asked Arcee. "When will it wake up?"

"I don't know! You can never tell with organics. It was a miracle I managed to patch it up in the first place."

I went into the medibay, followed by Arcee, Bumblebee and last but not least, Ratchet. We gazed down at the small creature. It was kept on a tray in the middle of a berth. Arcee crouched down for a better look."It looks kind of like a Cyberwolf." she said, finally. "You've seen one?" asked Ratchet in amazement. Cyberwolves were pretty rare after the Great War. Or so I've heard. I mean, I've never seen one myself.

Arcee nodded. "While I was on the run from Praxus."

**I can run an internet search on it's species.** offered Bumblebee. "Sure, go ahead." I said, waving my servo. Bee offlined his optics in concentration.

Just then, I heard the roaring of Bulkhead's engine from outside. "What happened?" he asked, coming into the room. Ratchet muttered something about there being too many 'bots in his sickbay and pushed his way past Bulkhead's considerable mass and out of the room.

**It's called a dog! **exclaimed Bumblebee suddenly. **To be accurate, a cocker spaniel. A human pet.**

"What's a human's head?" asked Bulkhead, confused. "Not a human head, Bulk. A human pet." said Arcee, exasperated. "Oooh..."

**Hey, where'd it go?** beeped Bumblebee, in panic. **I can't see it!**

We figured that it must have woken up and wandered off somewhere, so we began our search. I quickly spotted it near a couple of Ratchet's tools, mouthing them and pawing at them and in general trying to find out what they were. If Ratchet were here, I was pretty sure that he would be yelling his infamous _I needed that!_ just about now.

"Here you go." I said to it as I scooped it up. "Don't want you getting run over again." We all trooped out of the medical wing.

"Bumblebee! Monitor duty!" Ratchet ordered. Said mech nodded and skipped over to the monitor.

At that point, Optimus rolled in. "What is that?" he asked, looking at the brown object in my hand.

"It's a Thing." I explained, showing it to him.

"Dog, actually." Arcee corrected. I ignored her. I got the impression Optimus wasn't very impressed. "I nearly ran it over and then Ratchet fixed it. It's not a human, so it's not sentient, don't worry." I added hurriedly.

Optimus just subtly raised an optic ridge and strode past me. The Thing was accepted. For now. I kept it down carefully on the platform.

A few moments later, the proximity alarm sounded. Somebody was on the roof. We heard the elevator descending.

"Agent Fowler." I muttered under my intakes. Behind me, Bulkhead snorted. "More like Agent Fowl-est." "Or Agent Howler." added Arcee. Over at the monitor, Bumblebee beeped in agreement. **Maybe it's General Bryce.** he suggested hopefully. Ratchet just shook his head. The General was at least polite. Fowlest – I mean Fowler, on the other hand...

That one got on everybody's nerves. There weren't many things Team Prime agreed on, but we all hated Howler – I mean, Fowler. Except for maybe Optimus. (I'd never heard his thoughts on the subject. It's kind of annoying to see him getting yelled at for everything, even stuff he hasn't done. Sometimes, I wonder how even a Prime can stand so much.)

The elevator doors opened, and out stepped Agent Fowlest...I mean Fowler. "Status report, Prime!" he screeched. Suddenly, the Thing ran up to him and jumped on him. He fell over. I nearly burst out laughing.

"Why, in the name of Sam Hill, is there a mutt in the house?" He pushed the Thing off. Prime looked to me. My cue. I began telling the story.

Agent I'm-not-going-to-name-him sighed at the end of my fascinating tale. "Look, ten-ton-" I wondered absently why he calls me that. I'm ten-ton and Bulkhead's two-ton. Shouldn't it be the other way round? "-the pup has an owner. He's got a collar, see?" He lifted up the Thing by it. The Thing whined uneasily. "Some poor boy's probably looking for him by now. Just put him back wherever you found him." We looked at each other and shrugged. Nothing to lose. "And don't forget that status report!"

Once Optimus had given aforementioned report and the Agent was gone, Ratchet opened up the groundbridge so that we could keep the thing back. I picked up and quickly went through. Arcee accompanied me.

We were back in the patrol place. I kept the Thing down as carefully as I could and gave it a small pat on the helm – that is, head. "Stay safe, Thing. And don't go onto the middle of the road again. Find your guy, wherever he is." I gave it a last look as I Arcee and I returned to base. It began to howl – a spark-wrenching sound.

"Thing?" Arcee asked. "Really?"

"Well, I'm sure it's name isn't Dog." I retorted.

"Maybe, but it can't be Thing either." she argued.

And we bantered all the way through the groundbridge, back to base.

* * *

So, it was understandable, that when Bumblebee's charge asked him on the ride home after the Scraplet incident if the Autobots really did have pets, the yellow-and-back scout didn't know what to say. **Sort of.** he answered. **It's kind of hard to explain. We had a dog once...**


End file.
